Do we brush disagreements under the carpet?
After this week's political dramas, its clear that it doesn't matter whether you're in the government or a Quaker meeting – wherever there are people, there's the potential for conflict.
"People often silence themselves, or "agree to disagree" without fully exploring the actual nature of the disagreement, for the sake of protecting a relationship and maintaining connection. But when we avoid certain conversations, and never fully learn how the other person feels about all of the issues, we sometimes end up making assumptions that not only perpetuate but deepen misunderstandings, and that can generate resentment."
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Sorting out the government is thankfully someone else's job but for Quaker communities, help is at hand.
In March Quakers in Britain and Restoring Relations—a Quaker Recognised Body—are inviting Friends with experience or interest in resolving conflict, to two day-long events exploring ways to strengthen our communities and deal lovingly with difference.
"Conflict is part of our everyday lives. Our individual circumstances, opinions and viewpoints mean we do not always see things the same way," said Alistair Fuller, a local development team leader for Quakers in Britain. “It can lead to disagreements, difficult conversations and a breakdown in relationships. This is why we're delighted to be partnering with Restoring Relations who do so much great work in this area."
The long-term aim of Restoring Relations is to build a network of trained facilitators across Britain who can offer support to both individuals and Quaker communities.
"The two day-long conferences will be an opportunity to explore the practical steps we might take to develop deeper relationships and to better hold differences without division," explained Alistair.
"The aim is to develop capacity within Quaker communities and to build a network of Friends and groups who can respond to and support meetings experiencing conflict and to work with communities to build resilience and understanding to help mitigate the impact conflict so often has."
The 'Strong Loving Communities' conferences will be held at Central Bristol Meeting House on 7 March and Friargate Meeting House in York on 28 March .
Find out how to register for the conferences.
If your meeting is currently experiencing disagreement or conflict and you'd like help, please talk to your local development worker about exploring options or ideas about how to move forward.